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Top > General Lesbian Help Information > Article
Coming Out as a Teen Lesbian
By Kaylee Larson, LesbianLoveNow.com
As a teen lesbian, coming out to friends and family can be a difficult task, especially when your family members and peers are heterosexual and you are unsure about their views regarding homosexuality. Even if your family members and friends are very comfortable with homosexuality, the realization that their loved one is a lesbian can be a lot for them to swallow at first.
When coming out as a teen lesbian, there are several key points to remember in order to help your transition go more smoothly. With preparation, you may feel more confident to disclose such important news.
1) Plan your delivery
Figure out what you're going to say before initiating any type of conversation. Start by sorting out all of the details that you wish to express, point by point, on paper. Then mentally and verbally familiarize yourself with those points until you feel prepared to speak eloquently from your heart with the passion and confidence you need to reveal such an important aspect of yourself. Confidence is the key to gain others’ respect for what you are feeling.
2) Practice on a friend first
If you have a trusted friend who will accept you no matter what, let that person know that you are a lesbian, and tell him or her that you would like to tell your other friends and your family. Ask your friend if he or she will help you by allowing you to practice the conversation with him or her. Having the opportunity to hear your words out loud in front of someone before you face your other loved ones can fortify your confidence and help you determine the best way to express yourself.
3) Coming out
If you feel that your coming out is the right decision at the present time, pick an appropriate time and place in order to create an optimal environment in which to have such an important conversation. If you’re already in a relationship, don’t bring your girlfriend with you. If you are coming out to your parents, you don’t want to reveal such important information over the phone, and you don't want to do it in a confined public setting, as either method may convey disrespect and increase the risk of a negative reaction to your news.
If you feel there could be a chance that coming out to family members will lead them to treat you hurtfully, it might be in your best interest to wait and re-evaluate your situation. Revealing such sensitive information, especially at the wrong time, to those who may treat you in a such a way does not benefit anyone, as doing so could possibly cause unnecessary damage to your relationships. If you are unsure how to proceed and you need someone to talk to, there are plenty of support resources available to lesbians.
4) Be prepared to answer questions
Coming out to your parents can be much trickier than coming out to other family members or friends. Your parents may feel that they are losing you, so they may have questions about what your being a lesbian means to them. They may be concerned that having a lesbian daughter means that the prospect of biological grandchildren is lost, for example, so both parties will need to exercise understanding and comfort for each other.
Keep in mind that there is always the chance of your being outed before you have the opportunity to come out on your own terms to your friends and family. If you are caught in such a situation, here are some special tips for what you can do.
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